Matt Philbin
Managing Editor
Mattphilbin
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The Benedictines founded Benet Academy, but it sure sounds like the Jesuits got in there somehow.

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There are no circumstances – none – in which it is appropriate to sing or play John Lennon’s song “Imagine.” The vapid Marxist dirge drenched in stale hippie sentimentality makes everyone who hears it measurably dumber, and probably slows their reflexes and dulls their taste buds.

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Patton Oswalt wants you to know he holds all the correct opinions. Really. No, Oswalt personally hasn’t cancelled his old friend Dave Chappelle (“Sssss, Booo!”), but it’s because he’s pretty sure Chappelle can continue “evolving” to the higher plane where Oswalt and other enlightened lefties dwell in beatific complacency.

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John Cleese doesn’t suffer fools gladly, even when (or especially when) they’re self-important BBC presenters.

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Holiday entertainment fare for progressives is sadly lacking. The networks have been notoriously cautious about greenlighting The Twelve Genders of Christmas, while nobody will even fund Frosty and the Magic Morning After Pill.

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You’re an adult playing a game adapted from a children’s fantasy book about witches and magic. But you don’t want to be associated with the woman who invented the game in her children’s fantasy book about witches and magic because she’s not willing to indulge in your magic fantasies about human biology.

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Anybody paying attention laughs at the lefty media lie that Critical Race Theory isn’t in public schools. But what if CRT is in public school teachers?

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If you haven’t heard, there’s an athlete at Penn who’s destroying women’s swimming records. She's a man, baby!

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Everybody loves Christmas music. Christmas songs stir memories and help us feel reflective or festive. Artists keep recording them, and every year they make the charts. But very few new songs have anything to do with the birth of Jesus Christ.