Devastated that Donald Trump won back the presidency Tuesday night in a landslide victory? Terrified that the Nazis will soon be coming to your door, rounding up all the minorities and immigrants and enslaving women to be used as brood mares?
If so, you might be a moron. Unfortunately, insanity seems to be in abundant supply right now, so at least you're not alone.
And, if you happen to be a student at the University of Washington while suffering this deluded meltdown, there's help available! Not the help you need, of course - that would require intensive therapy and probably medication. But the school is offering a self-help workshop for anyone "shook" by the election results, including a talking session, a “relaxation room,” and a petting zoo.
That’s right - a petting zoo.
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On Wednesday from 1-5 p.m, the university, which supposedly trains young adults to enter the world as solid, capable citizens armed with the tools they’ll need to be skilled workers and leaders, provided small animals for traumatized students to snuggle as they cope with the loss of a presidential candidate who doesn’t know their name.
The event also included a “craft station” and a “gratitude wall,” where students could make art and write down things they’re still thankful for to remind themselves there’s a reason to get up in the morning.
You know, things like “I can still kill my baby whenever I want, because I live in Washington state,” and “at least grocery prices are still sky-high because Biden’s here until January.” Or whatever it is unhinged looney liberals are grateful for these days.
Just don’t expect to find “freedom” on the list.